Wednesday, June 20, 2007
"Army Wives" Lifetime series give me a break!
Did anyone see the new show on Lifetime called "Army Wives"? I waited with baited breath to view the first episode of the new Lifetime series “Army Wives.” My mind was abuzz with all the trials and tribulations that surely must be touched upon in such a series. Finally a drama would capture the essence of the military spouse, the sacrifices, the sorrows, the courage, and the triumph of some of the strongest people I know. With such a small population of the country affiliated with the military and an even smaller population truly concerned with the unpublished toils of the war on terror, I yearned for the creditability this show was destined to bring to military spouses. I looked forward to the same sense of belonging and understanding that as an ex- military wife as I felt. What I witnessed twice (I had to watch the encore just to assure myself I had not misinterpreted what I was seeing) was the utter degradation and humiliation of Military spouses everywhere. Shame on Lifetime and shame on Tanya Biank. Truly, Lifetime was desperate to sell sensationalism. My comrades-in-arms were portrayed as bar-hopping adulteresses, snobby officer-wife witches, rumor-spreading, uneducated, uncouth, abused women living on a post as made up as Wisteria Lane. I mean come on, who gets housing the very day they arrive on a post and I don't care how high ranking a sponsor is, NO child is getting a sports physical on the fly in the ER!!!........What I was hoping to see were Family Readiness groups struggling to create events to foster camaraderie among those left behind, broken phone trees due to phones being cut off, empty base houses from families packing up and moving home while the service member deploys and the local businesses going under from this economical attack on their home front. I hoped Lifetime could capture the endless labor of love that volunteer wives pump into the military community. I also hoped Lifetime could reveal the secret as to where these extra-ordinary women (and men) get the energy to keep giving. I envisioned a young military spouse delivering her child alone because she went into labor 3 days before her spouse’s R&R. I hoped to see the families trying to create continuity among their children’s education through home-schooling. I longed to see a storyline created around the unexpected friendships that form among people from different geographical locations, various races and ancestry and from totally different cultures. I hoped to find in any one of the characters just a little piece of reality- a woman with a career under pressure day in and day out to support my spouse, meet the demands of my job, keep up the house, the yard, and the bills, attend college and shuffle kids from place to place and trying to attend every possible school function for all three children to prevent anyone from feeling neglected. I wanted America to see the true struggles of our Military Wives. What about the tears late at night when no one is looking? What about the spouses that gets up dozens of times every night to check the doors to make sure they are locked? Where were the children who watch the Elmo video redundantly and sleep with mommy or daddy every night because they are afraid the service member will not come home? More credibility would have gone into a story about the battalion commander's wife (or family readiness leader) getting a call from a wife who has no money because her husband controls the funds and left her only minimal money to cover necessities while he was deployed. How about a story about the spouse who enters a store and gets an unexpected discount from a supportive business due to her husband's service? What about scenarios where the child of a military member is denied playing time on a team or denied scholarship opportunities due to moving late in their high school careers. Depictions of the pain and helplessness a military wife and mother feels when she cannot control or fix everything are much more realistic than a military wife secretly delivering someone else's (surrogate) babies on a pool table. As an author and the show’s consultant it appears that Tanya Biank has fallen victim to greed and is more interested in selling copies of her book and making money than she is at preserving the dignity of military wives everywhere. We may as well hang up our hats and open the door to stereotyping, criticism, and critique. The “Army Wives” Lifetime offered to America appear desperate for a follow-on assignment to Wisteria Lane. After just one episode, I say it is time for the packers! From my very own experiences as a military wife and mother, it is the hardest job in the military. Hats off to the women and men who take on this role daily, and to the Lifetime series "Army Wives", shame on you!
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1 comment:
Yes, I've watched all 3 episodes and although the scenarios may not be exactly true to life...the emotions are. We as military wives, struggle with finances, disciplining our children, fear, and clickes. I know it's different for me, because I don't live on post..I'm a military wife in a civilian world...so therefore I don't know what it's like to live on an army post...but I have found that I can relate to alot of the emotions portrayed on the show and in a strange way...feel connected. I know...it's just a show...that's why not all you see is true to life, but for now, I'm enjoying it.
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