--One cannot have what one wants
Unless one wants what one has.
--One cannot love oneself
Unless one’s self is loving.
--One cannot control one’s temper
Unless one tempers one’s control.
--One cannot fail for long
Unless one longs to fail.
--One cannot live in another’s shadow
Unless one shadows another.
--One cannot gain another’s trust
Unless one trusts another.
--One cannot be contented
Unless one is contented by being.
--One cannot be loving
Unless one loves being.
Showing posts with label Poems. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Poems. Show all posts
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
The Other Side of Town
On the other side of town
Where the privileged reside
The homes are large and stately
And quite elegant inside
No matter what the season
The grass is never brown
For the world is so much greener
On the other side of town
On the other side of town
Across the railroad tracks
The only disadvantage
Is the higher rate of tax
Where the sun casts golden shadows
Before it eases down
And the stars resemble diamonds
On the other side of town
I visited the east side of Paragould today and met a young lady staying at the mission outreach who's story makes me stop and thank God for the privilege of having a home. A place that I can lay my head, take a shower, lay on the couch, be myself, invite my friends and go when I have no place else.
Everyone has a story to tell of how life has treated them good and not so good. Most everyone has had bad things happen to them, but most have never been homeless. The lady I met today has written this poem I would like to share with those of you reading. She says it is only an expression of how she feels right now. She has been homeless for 2 years.
Homeless
No place to call my own, no where to have a home
I live in the streets, dirt and filth beneath my feet
Occasionally into the shelters I can stay
Where if I kiss their Asses they let me stay
I AM HOMELESS
There is no trust in the dark and dreary streets
For over my shoulder I am always looking
Ever afraid of what danger might be lurking
Just living is not an option for me, only survival is the key
I AM HOMELESS
Into the streets come the fakes and the phonies
Social, religious and do goodiers too, all shower me with false love
Forcing me to give in to all their causes
Never hearing or understanding my anguished pleas
I AM HOMELESS
Those who are in the know, say I don’t want to have a home
They say I like to roam and be free
That is not true, I do want a home and to be clean
To make a difference in a world so mean
I DO NOT WANT TO BE HOMELESS
But society is cruel, non-caring and elite
The world they have created, just can not be
Unless they make sure, they have people like me
In order to keep the world the way that it is, I cannot be freed
I MUST BE HOMELESS
Just food for thought. We have so much to be thankful for, and yet we are so stengy with our resources. Help those in need, lend a hand to the needy.
Where the privileged reside
The homes are large and stately
And quite elegant inside
No matter what the season
The grass is never brown
For the world is so much greener
On the other side of town
On the other side of town
Across the railroad tracks
The only disadvantage
Is the higher rate of tax
Where the sun casts golden shadows
Before it eases down
And the stars resemble diamonds
On the other side of town
I visited the east side of Paragould today and met a young lady staying at the mission outreach who's story makes me stop and thank God for the privilege of having a home. A place that I can lay my head, take a shower, lay on the couch, be myself, invite my friends and go when I have no place else.
Everyone has a story to tell of how life has treated them good and not so good. Most everyone has had bad things happen to them, but most have never been homeless. The lady I met today has written this poem I would like to share with those of you reading. She says it is only an expression of how she feels right now. She has been homeless for 2 years.
Homeless
No place to call my own, no where to have a home
I live in the streets, dirt and filth beneath my feet
Occasionally into the shelters I can stay
Where if I kiss their Asses they let me stay
I AM HOMELESS
There is no trust in the dark and dreary streets
For over my shoulder I am always looking
Ever afraid of what danger might be lurking
Just living is not an option for me, only survival is the key
I AM HOMELESS
Into the streets come the fakes and the phonies
Social, religious and do goodiers too, all shower me with false love
Forcing me to give in to all their causes
Never hearing or understanding my anguished pleas
I AM HOMELESS
Those who are in the know, say I don’t want to have a home
They say I like to roam and be free
That is not true, I do want a home and to be clean
To make a difference in a world so mean
I DO NOT WANT TO BE HOMELESS
But society is cruel, non-caring and elite
The world they have created, just can not be
Unless they make sure, they have people like me
In order to keep the world the way that it is, I cannot be freed
I MUST BE HOMELESS
Just food for thought. We have so much to be thankful for, and yet we are so stengy with our resources. Help those in need, lend a hand to the needy.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Sensational Charleston
Strong-willed and seeking solitude,
I’m standing like a stone on the old plantation,
Down in Charleston, South Carolina,
This is where I regain some relaxation.
There are exquisite vistas all around,
With that old maritime feel;
Nothing can beat the traditional cooking,
Or a tasty, southern style meal;
The terrain for the most part is flat,
And the enticing atmosphere’s kind of dark.
Curly Spanish moss carpets scores of trees,
And drips off their limbs and bark.
There are cypress swamps and tidal marshes,
With an abundance of greenery and growth;
Parts of them still look uncharted
And tons of wildlife occupies them both.
With a faded rebel flag popping in the wind,
And a slew of seagrass marsh fields,
They capture the very essence of the “old South”,
And the indelible history that it yields.
I can still recall September of 89’,
When hurricane Hugo slashed and swept through.
Many traces of it can still be seen
In some of those tokens it slammed into.
This whole area is just one of a kind,
And a person can really get lost in it all;
Its heritage and treasures shall be everlasting,
And are without a doubt in for the long haul.
Our time in Chrleston this week was by far one of the best trips I have taken. I lived in Charleston for 9 years and for the first time I went on vacation there. The weather was nice, the seafood was wonderful, the ocean was relaxing and the the company was great.
But there is no place like home
I’m standing like a stone on the old plantation,
Down in Charleston, South Carolina,
This is where I regain some relaxation.
There are exquisite vistas all around,
With that old maritime feel;
Nothing can beat the traditional cooking,
Or a tasty, southern style meal;
The terrain for the most part is flat,
And the enticing atmosphere’s kind of dark.
Curly Spanish moss carpets scores of trees,
And drips off their limbs and bark.
There are cypress swamps and tidal marshes,
With an abundance of greenery and growth;
Parts of them still look uncharted
And tons of wildlife occupies them both.
With a faded rebel flag popping in the wind,
And a slew of seagrass marsh fields,
They capture the very essence of the “old South”,
And the indelible history that it yields.
I can still recall September of 89’,
When hurricane Hugo slashed and swept through.
Many traces of it can still be seen
In some of those tokens it slammed into.
This whole area is just one of a kind,
And a person can really get lost in it all;
Its heritage and treasures shall be everlasting,
And are without a doubt in for the long haul.
Our time in Chrleston this week was by far one of the best trips I have taken. I lived in Charleston for 9 years and for the first time I went on vacation there. The weather was nice, the seafood was wonderful, the ocean was relaxing and the the company was great.
But there is no place like home
Friday, August 3, 2007
A Prophet’s Voice
I listen to the Prophet’s voice that spoke so clear to me
He spoke of all that I can do to be all that I can be
His words sank deep into my soul and filled my heart with love
And I became much closer to my Savior up above
This Prophet spoke of many sins and how we should repent
He testified of Jesus love and how His life was spent
He told me how my faith could grow if I’d just plant it’s seed
He taught me through his written word as I took time to read
You see these Prophet’s speak to us about these latter days
And show us though their life and times about our Savior’s ways
So join me as I read their words and hear their voices clear
By reading scripture everyday we’ll know our course to steer
He spoke of all that I can do to be all that I can be
His words sank deep into my soul and filled my heart with love
And I became much closer to my Savior up above
This Prophet spoke of many sins and how we should repent
He testified of Jesus love and how His life was spent
He told me how my faith could grow if I’d just plant it’s seed
He taught me through his written word as I took time to read
You see these Prophet’s speak to us about these latter days
And show us though their life and times about our Savior’s ways
So join me as I read their words and hear their voices clear
By reading scripture everyday we’ll know our course to steer
Friday, July 27, 2007
Abide With Him
I’ve often wondered how it felt to sit right by his side
To eat the bread that he prepared and with him there abide
To be so close and share with him his spirit and his love
And share a meal that was his last before he rose above
Oh yes it’s true he died that day and later he arose
Now he lives in heaven’s home his love still flows
He has prepared a place for us and patiently awaits
For each of us to follow him and enter heavens gate
The table of the Lord is set an invitation sent
And all that is required of us is that we all repent
What your wearing looks just fine and please don’t be late
For is your heaven destiny and Eternity is your fate.
To eat the bread that he prepared and with him there abide
To be so close and share with him his spirit and his love
And share a meal that was his last before he rose above
Oh yes it’s true he died that day and later he arose
Now he lives in heaven’s home his love still flows
He has prepared a place for us and patiently awaits
For each of us to follow him and enter heavens gate
The table of the Lord is set an invitation sent
And all that is required of us is that we all repent
What your wearing looks just fine and please don’t be late
For is your heaven destiny and Eternity is your fate.
Tiny Stone
There is a story in a book, That took place long ago
It’s a story about a boy, And a stone he had to throw
It seems there were two armies And their leaders squared to fight
But one was so big and strong The others filled with fright
The big one was so strong and fierce He taunted all the rest
But then there came a boy with faith To meet this mighty test
This faithful boy stepped forth alone And with his meager groan
He whirled his slingshot over head And loosed his tiny stone
The boy had faith that God would help And with the stone he threw
The giants day had ended And his army beaten too.
There are so many things we learn from David and his stone
Through him we learn that we can win although we seem alone
And when we are on the side of right the Lord will see us through
When we face our giants with faith and courage too.
I have faced allot of giants in my life and some of them defeated me because I did not have the faith or courage to battle them. Which by the way, is the tiny stone. The bible talks about "the faith of a mustard seed...." Now that's tiny. I still face giants every day that I am struggling with. But I know that I am not facing them alone. The Lord says, "fear not for I am with you always". And although there are days I don't "feel" his presence, my faith tells me He's here. I use to get caught up in the lies of feelings but I understand it is not about feelings. It is about faith. Believing in the things you cant see.
As I was driving home from a job late one night I was reminded of David and how he slayed a Giant of a man, 9 feet tall, that everyone else was afraid of. I have learned allot and just want to share a few of my own thoughts with you.
1. Don't believe what people say about you, believe what God says about you
I admire David's courage, he believed that with God's help, he could slay Goliath, but his brother Eliab accused him of presumption and having an evil heart. (1 Sam17:28) Eliab had a jealous heart toward Dave. He tried to make Dave feel small and worthless. I have always believed those type of people are so insecure about themselves that to tear someone down made them feel big. It don't. I know people like this. But Dave was a smart man, he "turned away from Eliab" (1 Sam17:30) He forgave them. I wish I could remember that lesson. "walk away its not worth it" I tell myself that but I don't always act on it.
It's hard when people you love hurt you, but David is teaching me to keep my heart pure of hatred, strife, offence, bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness. He walked away...keeping his focus (eyes) on God.
As I was reading this story, i could see Satan working in Eli, trying to bring Dave down, make him feel worthless, rejected, unacceptable. God fills our heart with faith and Satan tries to make us fear our abilities. He's to young, you don't have the right armor, He's allot bigger. But God uses the weak and rejected to show himself strong so no one can take the credit that is due him alone. (1Corinthians 1:26-29)
2.When God prompts you to do something, just do it!
When David looked at the giant, he "ran quickly toward the battle line" (1 Sam 17:48).
I think he knew that if he thought about Goliath too long, he might run away. He took action and obeyed God immediately, and I need to always do the same. When God prompts me to do something, run to do it. His grace will be present to help me.
3. You don't have to have abilities, just be available.
David had a slingshot and a stone. "no sword was in David's hand."(1 Sam17:50) He didn't come in to battle with this giant armed with high power guns a blazing..he had a string and a rock. Where everyone else seen a big problem, David seen it from God's view, not big at all. He wasn't the strongest, tallest, or the fastest, he wasn't the best choice according to the rest of guys standing around but David was available. He made himself available to God so to be used.
I want to be available, not to care what people think, or say about it. Just be used in any way God sees fit. I can already see so many opportunities He has put in my path through our church. I only have a short time left, and I want to fulfill my purpose while I have the time. I have wasted too many years. I know whatever He ask of me, he will provide the skills.
4. When you face your giant don't just confront it, cut it's head off.
Can you imagine what Goliath thought when he seen David? " I'm going to squash him like a grape." And then all of a sudden, "he took out a sling and a stone and slung it and it struck the giants head sticking into his forehead and he feel face down on the earth and David then drew his sword and cut off his head." (1 Sam17:49b, 51) Now that's the way to defeat a problem,
Head on...apply directly to the forehead..head on. I don't know why that commercial came to mind sorry...
A friend has been saying this for the past few weeks
"thinks are never as good or as bad as they seem, but most likely somewhere in between."
And i have to agree, we will always see our problems larger than they really are. But God sees them as a grain of sand. If I start looking at thinks from God's view, they don't seem to be as big as they seem. This is where we have to lean on him and trust him, because with him we can cut it's head off.
Well, my husband just got up to check on me, it's 4:35 am and I need to try to get a couple of hours before work. Hope this makes sense to anyone reading it. commit if you will please.
Moral of this Blog: Giants only get bigger if we fed them. Stop worrying that is it's food.
It’s a story about a boy, And a stone he had to throw
It seems there were two armies And their leaders squared to fight
But one was so big and strong The others filled with fright
The big one was so strong and fierce He taunted all the rest
But then there came a boy with faith To meet this mighty test
This faithful boy stepped forth alone And with his meager groan
He whirled his slingshot over head And loosed his tiny stone
The boy had faith that God would help And with the stone he threw
The giants day had ended And his army beaten too.
There are so many things we learn from David and his stone
Through him we learn that we can win although we seem alone
And when we are on the side of right the Lord will see us through
When we face our giants with faith and courage too.
I have faced allot of giants in my life and some of them defeated me because I did not have the faith or courage to battle them. Which by the way, is the tiny stone. The bible talks about "the faith of a mustard seed...." Now that's tiny. I still face giants every day that I am struggling with. But I know that I am not facing them alone. The Lord says, "fear not for I am with you always". And although there are days I don't "feel" his presence, my faith tells me He's here. I use to get caught up in the lies of feelings but I understand it is not about feelings. It is about faith. Believing in the things you cant see.
As I was driving home from a job late one night I was reminded of David and how he slayed a Giant of a man, 9 feet tall, that everyone else was afraid of. I have learned allot and just want to share a few of my own thoughts with you.
1. Don't believe what people say about you, believe what God says about you
I admire David's courage, he believed that with God's help, he could slay Goliath, but his brother Eliab accused him of presumption and having an evil heart. (1 Sam17:28) Eliab had a jealous heart toward Dave. He tried to make Dave feel small and worthless. I have always believed those type of people are so insecure about themselves that to tear someone down made them feel big. It don't. I know people like this. But Dave was a smart man, he "turned away from Eliab" (1 Sam17:30) He forgave them. I wish I could remember that lesson. "walk away its not worth it" I tell myself that but I don't always act on it.
It's hard when people you love hurt you, but David is teaching me to keep my heart pure of hatred, strife, offence, bitterness, resentment, and unforgiveness. He walked away...keeping his focus (eyes) on God.
As I was reading this story, i could see Satan working in Eli, trying to bring Dave down, make him feel worthless, rejected, unacceptable. God fills our heart with faith and Satan tries to make us fear our abilities. He's to young, you don't have the right armor, He's allot bigger. But God uses the weak and rejected to show himself strong so no one can take the credit that is due him alone. (1Corinthians 1:26-29)
2.When God prompts you to do something, just do it!
When David looked at the giant, he "ran quickly toward the battle line" (1 Sam 17:48).
I think he knew that if he thought about Goliath too long, he might run away. He took action and obeyed God immediately, and I need to always do the same. When God prompts me to do something, run to do it. His grace will be present to help me.
3. You don't have to have abilities, just be available.
David had a slingshot and a stone. "no sword was in David's hand."(1 Sam17:50) He didn't come in to battle with this giant armed with high power guns a blazing..he had a string and a rock. Where everyone else seen a big problem, David seen it from God's view, not big at all. He wasn't the strongest, tallest, or the fastest, he wasn't the best choice according to the rest of guys standing around but David was available. He made himself available to God so to be used.
I want to be available, not to care what people think, or say about it. Just be used in any way God sees fit. I can already see so many opportunities He has put in my path through our church. I only have a short time left, and I want to fulfill my purpose while I have the time. I have wasted too many years. I know whatever He ask of me, he will provide the skills.
4. When you face your giant don't just confront it, cut it's head off.
Can you imagine what Goliath thought when he seen David? " I'm going to squash him like a grape." And then all of a sudden, "he took out a sling and a stone and slung it and it struck the giants head sticking into his forehead and he feel face down on the earth and David then drew his sword and cut off his head." (1 Sam17:49b, 51) Now that's the way to defeat a problem,
Head on...apply directly to the forehead..head on. I don't know why that commercial came to mind sorry...
A friend has been saying this for the past few weeks
"thinks are never as good or as bad as they seem, but most likely somewhere in between."
And i have to agree, we will always see our problems larger than they really are. But God sees them as a grain of sand. If I start looking at thinks from God's view, they don't seem to be as big as they seem. This is where we have to lean on him and trust him, because with him we can cut it's head off.
Well, my husband just got up to check on me, it's 4:35 am and I need to try to get a couple of hours before work. Hope this makes sense to anyone reading it. commit if you will please.
Moral of this Blog: Giants only get bigger if we fed them. Stop worrying that is it's food.
Monday, July 16, 2007
Until My Heart Is Content
Until my own heart is content,
I will not be happy,
A mornful tide will fall upon my mere mortal of life,
And wisk away all hopes that serides.
Until my own heart is content,
I will not back down from a gesture,
Of any means or mines.
A dagger can fall and break,
I will not budge upon where I lay.
Until my own heart is content.
Until my own heart is content,
I shall not accept my grace,
I shall not hence anything that hithers my say so.
Until my own heart is content,
I shall rid the hatred of me,
And find longing in unspoken peace.
Until my own heart is content.
Until my own heart is content,
I will not see joy upon my face.
I will not you see morn.
I will be blank as a canvas,
That mere artist paints upon.
Until my picture is drawn upon my skeletal brow,
My heart will not be content.
So paint unknown artist,
Paint my hearts to its content.
I was reading in Proverbs 17:22 " But a broken spirit drieth the bones." KJV
If a broken spirit dries the bones, Lord, about now mine should be dust. I'm not at all content with my situation, and my heart is down in the dumps. How do I turn my spirit towards You again, where I can find the joy and contentment I'm missing. May I feel Your spirit touch my heart, so that I may bring good to those I see each day. Help me rejoice in You, no matter what is going on in my life. I don't want sin to turn me into a pile of dry bones, and I don't want to share that attitude with others. Pour Your blessed balm on my aching heart, O Lord.
"But a broken spirit sap's a person's strength" NLT
There are days when I feel I have no energy, no strength to accomplish all I have to do.
Zapped, weak, whipped, exhausted. I often wonder if I have what it takes to go another day, week or month. But then I am reminded of Isaiah 40 " Look up to the heavens, who created all the stars? He brings them out like an army, one after another, calling each by its name. Because of his great power and incomparable strength, not a single one is missing. How can I say the Lord does not see my trouble? Have I heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depth of his understanding. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint."
Lord, when my duties and obligations become too much for me, I ask why I must endure them. Yet, I read Your Word and understand that when I am beaten down, I am not defeated. Minor problems are opportunities for growth and prepare me for the major crises I will surely face along the way. You are equipping me to succeed despite momentary setbacks.
Prepare me to endure, not for a moment but for a lifetime. Teach me to develop the stamina to overcome not only momentary challenges but also trials that may last a lifetime.
Proverbs 17:22 " A cheerful heart is good medicine..."
Lord, I use to be a women who overflowed with a cheerful heart. My smile was continuous and my laugh loud, infecting everyone around me with the giggles. I made everyone feel good about themselves, no matter what the situation, because my concern was genuine. Lord, I wish I could live in continuous joy the way I use to. I want to be remembered for my laugh, my smile, my joy for life, but I am afraid people have forgotten who I was because of who I am. I would love to be content no matter what comes my way again. Keep me healthy as well as happy. The world could use a few of those people again.
I will not be happy,
A mornful tide will fall upon my mere mortal of life,
And wisk away all hopes that serides.
Until my own heart is content,
I will not back down from a gesture,
Of any means or mines.
A dagger can fall and break,
I will not budge upon where I lay.
Until my own heart is content.
Until my own heart is content,
I shall not accept my grace,
I shall not hence anything that hithers my say so.
Until my own heart is content,
I shall rid the hatred of me,
And find longing in unspoken peace.
Until my own heart is content.
Until my own heart is content,
I will not see joy upon my face.
I will not you see morn.
I will be blank as a canvas,
That mere artist paints upon.
Until my picture is drawn upon my skeletal brow,
My heart will not be content.
So paint unknown artist,
Paint my hearts to its content.
I was reading in Proverbs 17:22 " But a broken spirit drieth the bones." KJV
If a broken spirit dries the bones, Lord, about now mine should be dust. I'm not at all content with my situation, and my heart is down in the dumps. How do I turn my spirit towards You again, where I can find the joy and contentment I'm missing. May I feel Your spirit touch my heart, so that I may bring good to those I see each day. Help me rejoice in You, no matter what is going on in my life. I don't want sin to turn me into a pile of dry bones, and I don't want to share that attitude with others. Pour Your blessed balm on my aching heart, O Lord.
"But a broken spirit sap's a person's strength" NLT
There are days when I feel I have no energy, no strength to accomplish all I have to do.
Zapped, weak, whipped, exhausted. I often wonder if I have what it takes to go another day, week or month. But then I am reminded of Isaiah 40 " Look up to the heavens, who created all the stars? He brings them out like an army, one after another, calling each by its name. Because of his great power and incomparable strength, not a single one is missing. How can I say the Lord does not see my trouble? Have I heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depth of his understanding. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint."
Lord, when my duties and obligations become too much for me, I ask why I must endure them. Yet, I read Your Word and understand that when I am beaten down, I am not defeated. Minor problems are opportunities for growth and prepare me for the major crises I will surely face along the way. You are equipping me to succeed despite momentary setbacks.
Prepare me to endure, not for a moment but for a lifetime. Teach me to develop the stamina to overcome not only momentary challenges but also trials that may last a lifetime.
Proverbs 17:22 " A cheerful heart is good medicine..."
Lord, I use to be a women who overflowed with a cheerful heart. My smile was continuous and my laugh loud, infecting everyone around me with the giggles. I made everyone feel good about themselves, no matter what the situation, because my concern was genuine. Lord, I wish I could live in continuous joy the way I use to. I want to be remembered for my laugh, my smile, my joy for life, but I am afraid people have forgotten who I was because of who I am. I would love to be content no matter what comes my way again. Keep me healthy as well as happy. The world could use a few of those people again.
Monday, July 9, 2007
Drifting
I sometimes find I'm drifting
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.
I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.
You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone, I question
Just where I belong.
I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize, investigate
My life I will confess.
For somewhere deeper,
there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.
Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?
It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.
I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.
It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.
Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?
Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end, will I find truth ...
Or will I be perplexed?
Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?
Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.
Through this life without effect;
I often wonder if I'm truly
Worth what I've been blessed.
I search through days that have been hard,
To try to understand,
The many trials that I have known,
The life that I have had.
You see me in my daily grind,
So confident and strong;
Yet when I am alone, I question
Just where I belong.
I often try too hard I find,
To analyze and guess,
To scrutinize, investigate
My life I will confess.
For somewhere deeper,
there must be
Some meaning to this life,
Some way to make a difference,
Give a reason for this strife.
Is there some hidden meaning?
Some agenda to be found?
A greater purpose waiting
If I care to hang around?
It teases and it taunts me,
Always slightly out of sight;
A hazy vision out of reach,
Where darkness hides the light.
I struggle to bring clarity
To what awaits me there,
And yet this weak illusion
Always fades before my stare.
It seems the harder that I try,
To focus through the haze,
Just serves to add more questions,
Through my endless, tired gaze.
Perhaps I'm trying just too hard,
To understand it all,
For can we ever truly know
Just what we have in store?
Each incident, each moment passed,
Just adds upon the next,
But in the end, will I find truth ...
Or will I be perplexed?
Perhaps I make it harder
Than it has to be sometimes,
But will my searching bring to me
My meaning over time?
Or will it leave me broken,
And confused as I feel now,
While questions bring no solitude,
To this, my wrinkled brow.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Our Flag
Our flag is the symbol of this favored land
Its colors are red white and blue
It represents courage of those who would stand
And would die to protect me and you.
The bars of the flag that are beautifully white
Stands for innocence and purity.
While red is for valor against those we fight
And the blue is for Justice we see.
The stars are assembled on background of blue
They represent stars in the sky
Together these symbols remind me and you
That divine goals are why we should try.
When counted these stars number fifty you know
They represent states in our land
And "In God we Trust" is our motto we show
While together we always will stand.
Its colors are red white and blue
It represents courage of those who would stand
And would die to protect me and you.
The bars of the flag that are beautifully white
Stands for innocence and purity.
While red is for valor against those we fight
And the blue is for Justice we see.
The stars are assembled on background of blue
They represent stars in the sky
Together these symbols remind me and you
That divine goals are why we should try.
When counted these stars number fifty you know
They represent states in our land
And "In God we Trust" is our motto we show
While together we always will stand.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Bless This Land
T’was on the 4th of a summer month
So many years ago,
When forefathers, sons and daughters,
Gave lives so our country could grow.
They fought for the rights and freedom we have;
They fought for their families too.
They fought against Tyrants and unrighteous law,
And did this for me and for you.
These patriots fought for the freedom to pray,
And to worship the God of their choice.
Then against bitter odds, but with divine help
They fought, to be Government’s voice.
So now we here stand, in this favored land
With freedom and liberty too.
To guard and protect and cherish these rights,
Is something that we should all do.
Now join me this day on the 4th of July
As we raise our voices to say;
God bless this land and this Government too.
God bless, the U. S. of A.!
So many years ago,
When forefathers, sons and daughters,
Gave lives so our country could grow.
They fought for the rights and freedom we have;
They fought for their families too.
They fought against Tyrants and unrighteous law,
And did this for me and for you.
These patriots fought for the freedom to pray,
And to worship the God of their choice.
Then against bitter odds, but with divine help
They fought, to be Government’s voice.
So now we here stand, in this favored land
With freedom and liberty too.
To guard and protect and cherish these rights,
Is something that we should all do.
Now join me this day on the 4th of July
As we raise our voices to say;
God bless this land and this Government too.
God bless, the U. S. of A.!
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Soldiers
Looking out on the horizon,
Cheek rested on his M-16
So much work left to be done
So much left to be seen.
His uniform tan and brown
Like the color of the sand
He sits fatigued now
Watching the dirt sift through his hand.
The hours roll on by
All work and not much fun
He adjusts the helmet as he sighs
And stares up at the blazing sun.
He checks and rechecks his gear
As sweat drips from his brow
He wishes it was home here
Or that he could be there now.
He looks out at the sand
Collecting it inside his bag
He stares down in his hand
A small American flag.
He remembers why he's here
He remembers his call
He remembers that year
When men gave their all.
He sits up straighter now
He understands his part
He answered the call somehow
It must be the pride in his heart.
Cheek rested on his M-16
So much work left to be done
So much left to be seen.
His uniform tan and brown
Like the color of the sand
He sits fatigued now
Watching the dirt sift through his hand.
The hours roll on by
All work and not much fun
He adjusts the helmet as he sighs
And stares up at the blazing sun.
He checks and rechecks his gear
As sweat drips from his brow
He wishes it was home here
Or that he could be there now.
He looks out at the sand
Collecting it inside his bag
He stares down in his hand
A small American flag.
He remembers why he's here
He remembers his call
He remembers that year
When men gave their all.
He sits up straighter now
He understands his part
He answered the call somehow
It must be the pride in his heart.
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Why?
Why do we hurt?
What is with pain?
Why do we do it?
What do we gain?
Do we gain strength?
Does it bring God near?
Does it help us understand?
Does it help us to see?
What is love?
Why do we feel it?
Is it important?
Are we forced to deal with it?
What if I stopped loving?
Would I feel pain?
But then, once again,
What would I gain?
Love is to be cherished.
Love can make you whole.
Love is what keeps us alive.
Love is the language of the soul.
Why do I hurt? (BRTN3325)
My heart has been so heavy, as if I had a large weight is sitting on top of my chest. Burdened, sore, aching, like it is crying out for something to stop the pain. Thoughts run through my mind of different ways to stop the insanity....sleepless nights, mind screaming to the top of its thoughts, crazy sounds... like some one wanting out.
Someone left me a comment saying "what an amazing strong human being I am" they don't know me... anyone wants to know me... really knows me. A world full of people and no one knows me.
Sunday morning.... Maria still in bed...Gary playing at Reynolds... Here I sit.... Been up since 4:30 am waken to a phone call from Arkansas Methodist Hospital Trauma Room. Didn't get to the call in time... hospital won't give me any information....waiting for the bad news... have called a waken every body I know.. Kayla home in bed..Landon and Lindsey home in bed... family out of town safe.... Christie and Kim sound to sleep...fine.. so who? praying to God everyone is safe.....waiting for bad news.
I can't handle any more bad news!... I have had my life share of it.
What is with pain?
Why do we do it?
What do we gain?
Do we gain strength?
Does it bring God near?
Does it help us understand?
Does it help us to see?
What is love?
Why do we feel it?
Is it important?
Are we forced to deal with it?
What if I stopped loving?
Would I feel pain?
But then, once again,
What would I gain?
Love is to be cherished.
Love can make you whole.
Love is what keeps us alive.
Love is the language of the soul.
Why do I hurt? (BRTN3325)
My heart has been so heavy, as if I had a large weight is sitting on top of my chest. Burdened, sore, aching, like it is crying out for something to stop the pain. Thoughts run through my mind of different ways to stop the insanity....sleepless nights, mind screaming to the top of its thoughts, crazy sounds... like some one wanting out.
Someone left me a comment saying "what an amazing strong human being I am" they don't know me... anyone wants to know me... really knows me. A world full of people and no one knows me.
Sunday morning.... Maria still in bed...Gary playing at Reynolds... Here I sit.... Been up since 4:30 am waken to a phone call from Arkansas Methodist Hospital Trauma Room. Didn't get to the call in time... hospital won't give me any information....waiting for the bad news... have called a waken every body I know.. Kayla home in bed..Landon and Lindsey home in bed... family out of town safe.... Christie and Kim sound to sleep...fine.. so who? praying to God everyone is safe.....waiting for bad news.
I can't handle any more bad news!... I have had my life share of it.
Escape
I want to get away.
That's all,
Just gone,
Away from silent nightmares, loud cities,
Glass love-
Away.
Any place will do: Kansas, Africa, anywhere...
Quiet clean air, that's important:
To feel the sun, touch truth,
breathe God and music.
No sorrow-I have sorrowed long enough;
Cringed and wept.
Time now to sleep and smile.
No fight-
I have fought long enough;
Crawled and chewed.
Time now to drink some peace,
Luke-warm in a sanitary cup,
Not cracked or chipped-
All holy and well-made.
My best friend and I are celebrating our 50Th birthday this year.... May..our birthdays are one week to the day apart..I'm older and she doesn't let me live that down. We have celebrated our birthdays since we were 15 years old. Our mothers would bake our cakes and put both our names on them ... for the past several years we would just take a couple of days and go "shopping" in Memphis...this year is going to be special.
We wanted to go some place very special, exotic, enchanting, with beaches, etc. We first looked at cruises to the Caribbean..to expensive...then we looked at south Florida...too dangerous.. then we thought about Las Vegas...too sinful..So we decided on Charleston SC...my home away from home. She had been several times but only for a day. I lived there 9 years. And we have promised each other for years we would make this trip together. Ta Da..our 50Th Birthday trip is booked we will leave paradise on August 4 and return to paradise on August 11!!!! 7 whole days of beach, good seafood, relaxing walks on the cobblestone streets of the most enchanting city in the US. I can't wait!!
Now, you must be asking yourself..What about Gary and Maria? Good question. Maria is going to stay behind and hold down the fort (Dustbuster's) and Gary is going to do what Gary loves to do more than anything in the world.......nothing! He won't have me here with a "honey-do list", or nagging about something some one has done or didn't do, or the phone ringing a hundred times during his favorite program ( no one calls when I'm not here) sad but true, or snoring so loud I wake him in the night telling me to roll over:) So he will be in paradise.
He will miss me so bad by day 1, it won't be funny. And I will miss him by day 8, it won't be funny:) just kidding. I know it will be good for me to just get away for a few days, I want to go to Magnolia Gardens where there are 5 trees planted in memory of my son Chad. I love to go and see how big they have grown. I can't wait to have lunch at my favorite resturant Hyman's Seafood were I always order the same dish for the past 27 years...3 dozen raw oysters, and their famous she-crab soup... my mouth is watering.
That's all,
Just gone,
Away from silent nightmares, loud cities,
Glass love-
Away.
Any place will do: Kansas, Africa, anywhere...
Quiet clean air, that's important:
To feel the sun, touch truth,
breathe God and music.
No sorrow-I have sorrowed long enough;
Cringed and wept.
Time now to sleep and smile.
No fight-
I have fought long enough;
Crawled and chewed.
Time now to drink some peace,
Luke-warm in a sanitary cup,
Not cracked or chipped-
All holy and well-made.
My best friend and I are celebrating our 50Th birthday this year.... May..our birthdays are one week to the day apart..I'm older and she doesn't let me live that down. We have celebrated our birthdays since we were 15 years old. Our mothers would bake our cakes and put both our names on them ... for the past several years we would just take a couple of days and go "shopping" in Memphis...this year is going to be special.
We wanted to go some place very special, exotic, enchanting, with beaches, etc. We first looked at cruises to the Caribbean..to expensive...then we looked at south Florida...too dangerous.. then we thought about Las Vegas...too sinful..So we decided on Charleston SC...my home away from home. She had been several times but only for a day. I lived there 9 years. And we have promised each other for years we would make this trip together. Ta Da..our 50Th Birthday trip is booked we will leave paradise on August 4 and return to paradise on August 11!!!! 7 whole days of beach, good seafood, relaxing walks on the cobblestone streets of the most enchanting city in the US. I can't wait!!
Now, you must be asking yourself..What about Gary and Maria? Good question. Maria is going to stay behind and hold down the fort (Dustbuster's) and Gary is going to do what Gary loves to do more than anything in the world.......nothing! He won't have me here with a "honey-do list", or nagging about something some one has done or didn't do, or the phone ringing a hundred times during his favorite program ( no one calls when I'm not here) sad but true, or snoring so loud I wake him in the night telling me to roll over:) So he will be in paradise.
He will miss me so bad by day 1, it won't be funny. And I will miss him by day 8, it won't be funny:) just kidding. I know it will be good for me to just get away for a few days, I want to go to Magnolia Gardens where there are 5 trees planted in memory of my son Chad. I love to go and see how big they have grown. I can't wait to have lunch at my favorite resturant Hyman's Seafood were I always order the same dish for the past 27 years...3 dozen raw oysters, and their famous she-crab soup... my mouth is watering.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
What He Sees
I wonder what it would be like to watch our Lord one day
I wonder what He sees us do or hear the words we say
I wonder if He smiles when we begin each day in prayer
Or when we stop to help someone or show how much we care
I bet he’d be so proud of us to see the poor we’ve fed
And see we’ve clothed the needy and put warm blankets on their bed
Then too, He’d likely shed a tear for those that lost their way
Or those that caused such broken hearts with bitter words they say
But then I’m sure He’d smile again to watch the children play
Or watch a mother teach her child the reasons why we pray
And then to me, this thought occurs His eyes will turn to me
Oh Lord I hope your smiling still when what I do you see.
Have you ever had one of those days when there are a dozen things on your desk and as you transition from one thing to another, you get interrupted- by God. At least I think it’s God.
In the middle of writing down what I had to do tomorrow and picking up a book to read, I stopped. I was looking at nothing in particular, nothing had caught my attention, but these are the thoughts that went through my head.
Will God answer my prayers? Does God have a good sence of humor? Why don't You stop pain & evil? Why are humans so easily manipulated? And what does He think about the way we are taking care of the earth? Questions. Your mind can just run away with itself or is it God?
And then I went back to what I was doing and I was interrutrd again - by God. Here are the thoughts that ran through my head.
What questions or advice God would have for me. As he shock his head saying "Vicki, Vicki, Vicki". God wouldn't ask me if I built a sucessful business, He would ask did I built a loving family? God wouldn't ask me how high my salary was, He would ask did I compromised my charater to attain it? God wouldn't ask me why I called on Him when things are tough, He would ask me did I praise Him when things are smooth. He wouldn't ask me why I didn't solve the world's problem, He will ask me did I love my neighbor? God wouldn't ask me how beautiful I looked, He will ask me did i see the beauty in others. He wouldn't ask me why I have so many questions, He will ask me did I search for the answers.
Moral of this Blog: "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness;and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33 "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities — His eternal power and divine nature — have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." Romans 1:20
I wonder what He sees us do or hear the words we say
I wonder if He smiles when we begin each day in prayer
Or when we stop to help someone or show how much we care
I bet he’d be so proud of us to see the poor we’ve fed
And see we’ve clothed the needy and put warm blankets on their bed
Then too, He’d likely shed a tear for those that lost their way
Or those that caused such broken hearts with bitter words they say
But then I’m sure He’d smile again to watch the children play
Or watch a mother teach her child the reasons why we pray
And then to me, this thought occurs His eyes will turn to me
Oh Lord I hope your smiling still when what I do you see.
Have you ever had one of those days when there are a dozen things on your desk and as you transition from one thing to another, you get interrupted- by God. At least I think it’s God.
In the middle of writing down what I had to do tomorrow and picking up a book to read, I stopped. I was looking at nothing in particular, nothing had caught my attention, but these are the thoughts that went through my head.
Will God answer my prayers? Does God have a good sence of humor? Why don't You stop pain & evil? Why are humans so easily manipulated? And what does He think about the way we are taking care of the earth? Questions. Your mind can just run away with itself or is it God?
And then I went back to what I was doing and I was interrutrd again - by God. Here are the thoughts that ran through my head.
What questions or advice God would have for me. As he shock his head saying "Vicki, Vicki, Vicki". God wouldn't ask me if I built a sucessful business, He would ask did I built a loving family? God wouldn't ask me how high my salary was, He would ask did I compromised my charater to attain it? God wouldn't ask me why I called on Him when things are tough, He would ask me did I praise Him when things are smooth. He wouldn't ask me why I didn't solve the world's problem, He will ask me did I love my neighbor? God wouldn't ask me how beautiful I looked, He will ask me did i see the beauty in others. He wouldn't ask me why I have so many questions, He will ask me did I search for the answers.
Moral of this Blog: "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness;and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33 "For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities — His eternal power and divine nature — have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." Romans 1:20
Monday, June 18, 2007
Letter to a Military Spouse
The military wives should be honored right along with their soldier. I have a dear friend, who shares her anxiety, fears, triumphs, and loneliness on her blog daily. She is a military wive whose husband is in Iraq defending our nation. But as I read her blog I can only try to understand what she is feeling. This letter is most appropriate as it comes from a civilian with no ties to the military................................
I felt the need to write you and express a very deep feeling that I have in my heart. I, as a person, am not brave. I do not tackle things head on, as I hate confrontation. I will travel 100 miles out of my way just to avoid a conflict. I am a American woman that has no idea what is going on in the military other that what I hear on the news. I never had to let go of someone so that they could go fight for people that they did not know, people that sometimes do not appreciate or understand what they are fighting for.
I have never had a sleepless night of worry because of a report that another bomb has exploded and I still haven’t heard from my husband. I have never had to wait for months on end to hold the one that I loved so. I have never had to tell my children that daddy wasn’t coming home tonight because he was so far away fighting for something that they aren’t yet old enough to understand. I have never had to hold my head up high and suppress the tears as I hear that it will be at least another six months of separation before my loves one gets to come home.
I have never had to deal with a holiday away from the one that I thought I would share every day of my life with. And I have never had to feel the panic, rising in my heart at the sound of a ringing phone or knock at the door for fear that it is the news that everyone is terrified of getting.
For the reasons listed above, I can not tell you that I understand how you feel. I can not tell you that you must be strong. I can not say that you shouldn’t be angry, because you " knew what you were getting into when you married a military man." I can not say these things because I have never had to walk in your shoes.
What can I say for certain is that because of your unselfish acts of bravery and your husbands willingness to stand up for those who see him as " just another soldier"---- I will never have to walk in your shoes.
I do understand that a military wife you are expected to uphold a certain amount of control , but I never understood how you could do it, until now। I have figured out that you are not like other woman. You are of a special breed. You have a strength within you, that holds life together in the darkest of hours, a strength of which I will never possess. The faith you have is what makes you stand out in a crowd; it makes you glow with emotion and swell with pride at the mention of The United States of America.
You are a special lady, a wonderful partner and a glorious American. I have more respect for your husband than I could ever tell you, but until recently I never thought much about those that the soldier leaves at home during deployment.
Until this moment I could never put into words exactly what America meant to me.
Until this moment, I had no real reason to….....
Your husband and his military family hold this nation close, safe from those who wish to hurt us…. But you and those like you are the backbone of the American family. You keep the wheels in motion and the hearts alive while most would just break completely down. Military families make this nation what is today.
You give us all hope and you emit a warming light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
Because of you and your family…I am able to be me. I am able to have my family. I am able to walk free in this great land. Because of you and your family, I can look ahead to the future with the knowledge that life is going to be okay. Because of you and your family, I can awake to a new day, everyday.
I realize that you are a stronger person than I will ever be because of these things and I just wanted to take the time today to say thank you to you and your family for allowing me that freedom.
I will never be able to repay this dept to you, as it is unmatchable. However, I hope that you know that no matter where you are… what you doing… what has happened today…or what will happen tomorrow…your husband will NEVER be " just another soldier" to me… And you, my dear sweet lady, will never be forgotten.
You are all in my prayers everyday and I pray that God will bring you back together with your loved one safely.
Note: Although this letter was written to military wives, of course, there are male military spouses too. Substitute "husband" for "wife," and everyone is covered, and thanked for their sacrifices. I simply printed this letter as it was written.
I felt the need to write you and express a very deep feeling that I have in my heart. I, as a person, am not brave. I do not tackle things head on, as I hate confrontation. I will travel 100 miles out of my way just to avoid a conflict. I am a American woman that has no idea what is going on in the military other that what I hear on the news. I never had to let go of someone so that they could go fight for people that they did not know, people that sometimes do not appreciate or understand what they are fighting for.
I have never had a sleepless night of worry because of a report that another bomb has exploded and I still haven’t heard from my husband. I have never had to wait for months on end to hold the one that I loved so. I have never had to tell my children that daddy wasn’t coming home tonight because he was so far away fighting for something that they aren’t yet old enough to understand. I have never had to hold my head up high and suppress the tears as I hear that it will be at least another six months of separation before my loves one gets to come home.
I have never had to deal with a holiday away from the one that I thought I would share every day of my life with. And I have never had to feel the panic, rising in my heart at the sound of a ringing phone or knock at the door for fear that it is the news that everyone is terrified of getting.
For the reasons listed above, I can not tell you that I understand how you feel. I can not tell you that you must be strong. I can not say that you shouldn’t be angry, because you " knew what you were getting into when you married a military man." I can not say these things because I have never had to walk in your shoes.
What can I say for certain is that because of your unselfish acts of bravery and your husbands willingness to stand up for those who see him as " just another soldier"---- I will never have to walk in your shoes.
I do understand that a military wife you are expected to uphold a certain amount of control , but I never understood how you could do it, until now। I have figured out that you are not like other woman. You are of a special breed. You have a strength within you, that holds life together in the darkest of hours, a strength of which I will never possess. The faith you have is what makes you stand out in a crowd; it makes you glow with emotion and swell with pride at the mention of The United States of America.
You are a special lady, a wonderful partner and a glorious American. I have more respect for your husband than I could ever tell you, but until recently I never thought much about those that the soldier leaves at home during deployment.
Until this moment I could never put into words exactly what America meant to me.
Until this moment, I had no real reason to….....
Your husband and his military family hold this nation close, safe from those who wish to hurt us…. But you and those like you are the backbone of the American family. You keep the wheels in motion and the hearts alive while most would just break completely down. Military families make this nation what is today.
You give us all hope and you emit a warming light at the end of a long dark tunnel.
Because of you and your family…I am able to be me. I am able to have my family. I am able to walk free in this great land. Because of you and your family, I can look ahead to the future with the knowledge that life is going to be okay. Because of you and your family, I can awake to a new day, everyday.
I realize that you are a stronger person than I will ever be because of these things and I just wanted to take the time today to say thank you to you and your family for allowing me that freedom.
I will never be able to repay this dept to you, as it is unmatchable. However, I hope that you know that no matter where you are… what you doing… what has happened today…or what will happen tomorrow…your husband will NEVER be " just another soldier" to me… And you, my dear sweet lady, will never be forgotten.
You are all in my prayers everyday and I pray that God will bring you back together with your loved one safely.
Note: Although this letter was written to military wives, of course, there are male military spouses too. Substitute "husband" for "wife," and everyone is covered, and thanked for their sacrifices. I simply printed this letter as it was written.
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Friendship...Priceless
I got another e-mail today that made me stop and think. I don't know about you but I read things that sometimes really stick with me for hours, sometimes days. Can't seem to stop thinking about it. I will share my thoughts on what I read and perhaps it speak to someone else.
"Never under estimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way."
This statement was at the bottom of a rather long story about a young man who had been picked on in school. I give you the short story"A kid from class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. He had big thick glasses, holes in his shoes, dirty clothes, and smelled bad. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon) so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye." They became friends, the boy grew up to be very popular in his class, with the girls, and valedictorian of the class. Graduation night, as he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story." He told the story of the first day he met his best friend. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at his friend and gave him a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."
We all know people like this, they don't look the way we look, , they don't dress the way we dress, they don't talk the way we talk and they don't act the way we act, no self-respect. We see them in the grocery store, drug stores, Wal-mart and we think to ourselves "they stink" or "how dirty" we walk the other way. I have been guilty of this myself.
But what I can't seem to stop thinking about with this story is this: What if someone I wouldn't normally speck to were planning to commit suicide or harm some one else, and a simple gesture, a smile, a kind word or a conversation in line at Wal-mart changed they way they were feeling that day. Perhaps it wasn't something as dramatic as killing them self but just feeling depressed, worried, or hopeless. Something that wouldn't cost me anything could be priceless to someone else. I am going to test this to day while I am out. I'm going to look for someone who has stress lines, bratty kids crying for something they can't have because she can't afford to get it, someone who doesn't dress like me, or smell like me. I'm going out with the intention of making someone feel better, smile, laugh today. I will let you know how my experiment works tomorrow.
"Never under estimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way."
This statement was at the bottom of a rather long story about a young man who had been picked on in school. I give you the short story"A kid from class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. He had big thick glasses, holes in his shoes, dirty clothes, and smelled bad. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon) so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye." They became friends, the boy grew up to be very popular in his class, with the girls, and valedictorian of the class. Graduation night, as he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story." He told the story of the first day he met his best friend. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at his friend and gave him a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable."
We all know people like this, they don't look the way we look, , they don't dress the way we dress, they don't talk the way we talk and they don't act the way we act, no self-respect. We see them in the grocery store, drug stores, Wal-mart and we think to ourselves "they stink" or "how dirty" we walk the other way. I have been guilty of this myself.
But what I can't seem to stop thinking about with this story is this: What if someone I wouldn't normally speck to were planning to commit suicide or harm some one else, and a simple gesture, a smile, a kind word or a conversation in line at Wal-mart changed they way they were feeling that day. Perhaps it wasn't something as dramatic as killing them self but just feeling depressed, worried, or hopeless. Something that wouldn't cost me anything could be priceless to someone else. I am going to test this to day while I am out. I'm going to look for someone who has stress lines, bratty kids crying for something they can't have because she can't afford to get it, someone who doesn't dress like me, or smell like me. I'm going out with the intention of making someone feel better, smile, laugh today. I will let you know how my experiment works tomorrow.
Monday, June 11, 2007
Hang it on the Cross
If you have a secret sorrow,
a burden or a loss,
An aching need for healing...
Hang it on the Cross
If worry steals your sleep
and makes you turn and toss
If your heart is feeling heavy...
Hang it on the Cross
Every obstacle in faith
that you come across
Every prayer unanswered...
Hang it on the Cross
For Christ was borne for brokenness
and dearly paid the cost
To turn our trials to triumph...
So Hang it on the Cross
Thank you Lord, that I don't have to worry, carry, loss sleep or burden myself with the woes that the world throws at me each day. "Thank you for the cross Lord. Thank you for the price You paid, Bearing all my sin and shame In love You came And gave amazing grace. Thank you for this love Lord Thank you for the nail pierced hands Washed me in Your cleansing flow Now all I know is Your forgiveness and embrace." (Hillsongs: Worthy is the Lamb) otherwise known as Gingers song:)
Thank you Father for allowing me to nail my attitude, accusations, battles, blindness, burdens, complaining, depression, disappointments, disobedience, emotions, emptiness, fears, frustrations, grumbling, guilt, human nature, hurt, idols, impatience, jealousy, judgement of others, lust, loneliness, mistakes, misconceptions, needs, neglect, obsessions, offences, panic, pain, pride, rebellion, regret, secrets, self-centeredness, self-control, selfishness, self-pity, shame, sickness, sorrow, suffering, temptations, trials, unbelief, unfaithfulness, uselessness, vanity, verbal abuse, walls, weakness, and worry to the cross. Thank you for repentance, forgiveness for all these sins that may not all attack me at once but sneak up on me everyday. Thank you that I can ask and you will..
Moral of this Blog: "You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive in Christ. He forgave all our sins. He canceled the record that contained the charges against us. He took it away, nailing it to the Christ's cross. In this way, God disarmed the evil rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross of Christ." Colossians 2:13-15
"Cast your cares (burdens) on the Lord and He will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." Psalm 55:22
l
a burden or a loss,
An aching need for healing...
Hang it on the Cross
If worry steals your sleep
and makes you turn and toss
If your heart is feeling heavy...
Hang it on the Cross
Every obstacle in faith
that you come across
Every prayer unanswered...
Hang it on the Cross
For Christ was borne for brokenness
and dearly paid the cost
To turn our trials to triumph...
So Hang it on the Cross
Thank you Lord, that I don't have to worry, carry, loss sleep or burden myself with the woes that the world throws at me each day. "Thank you for the cross Lord. Thank you for the price You paid, Bearing all my sin and shame In love You came And gave amazing grace. Thank you for this love Lord Thank you for the nail pierced hands Washed me in Your cleansing flow Now all I know is Your forgiveness and embrace." (Hillsongs: Worthy is the Lamb) otherwise known as Gingers song:)
Thank you Father for allowing me to nail my attitude, accusations, battles, blindness, burdens, complaining, depression, disappointments, disobedience, emotions, emptiness, fears, frustrations, grumbling, guilt, human nature, hurt, idols, impatience, jealousy, judgement of others, lust, loneliness, mistakes, misconceptions, needs, neglect, obsessions, offences, panic, pain, pride, rebellion, regret, secrets, self-centeredness, self-control, selfishness, self-pity, shame, sickness, sorrow, suffering, temptations, trials, unbelief, unfaithfulness, uselessness, vanity, verbal abuse, walls, weakness, and worry to the cross. Thank you for repentance, forgiveness for all these sins that may not all attack me at once but sneak up on me everyday. Thank you that I can ask and you will..
Moral of this Blog: "You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive in Christ. He forgave all our sins. He canceled the record that contained the charges against us. He took it away, nailing it to the Christ's cross. In this way, God disarmed the evil rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross of Christ." Colossians 2:13-15
"Cast your cares (burdens) on the Lord and He will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall." Psalm 55:22
l
Monday, June 4, 2007
Hidden Blessings
We are so blessed with many things
We’re blessed with good and bad
We’re blessed with things that make us smile
Some that make us sad
Some blessing are the gifts we have
And talents we possess
Like paintings or a song we sing
Or writings we express
These blessings help us grow inside
While sharing things we do
And often help the other folks
To see the hard times through
Some things are so difficult
The blessings hard to see
They often cloud or grip our lives
In spite of prayerful pleas
If we can learn to see the good
In things that get us down
Then we can see the blessing
In things that make us frown
It must have been so very hard
For Mary on that day
To watch her son be crucified
As she knelt down to pray
He was the perfect Son of God
So young, with much to do
And yet He was called home to God
A tortured death gone through
As we recall our Saviors life
And then our lives compare
It seems a little easier
To see the joy we share
For He has risen home to God
In heaven ‘s home above
And we can each be joining him
Because of the Fathers love
I want to thank you one and all for your comments to the things you are reading on my blog. I sometimes forget that you are there as I sit here in the quite of my room and try to type as fast as mind thinks...that can be tricky..most of you know I talk so imagine how difficult it is to type that fast:) I want you to know from the deepest place in my heart I do not write for your entertainment, I write for my therapy. I needed a place to sort some things out, and I have found an outlet for my sometimes twisted thoughts and emotions that have been bottled up for years. It is difficult to find friends who just want to be there for you. Most feel the need to council, others feel that don't know what to say so they just stay away, and then there are those who just don't really care because it is all about them...you have someone that just popped in your head didn't you:) I feel like I am talking to God not you. I am grateful that you tune in and enjoy my conversation with Him, but I do not blog to offend, to stir up trouble or to single out. I blog because God has given me a gift to express what I feel it is sometimes an eye opener to me by just putting it out there, perhaps you have read something that got you to think about the very thing I myself was wondering, or perhaps you read something that touched you in the same way it touched me when I stopped typing long enough to go back and read what my fingers are saying. If that is the case Praise God for His wonderful insight to you and to me. Please don't take it personal its about me, not you. I love to write poems, I love to express what God is doing in my life and I love that although I may not be able to sit down over a glass of Gary's famous sweet tea, that I can share it with you on my blog. I didn't realize how many people are reading this each day. But I love the comments I am recieving through my email and I love that you are being Blessed.Moral of this blog: "How we praise God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we belong to Christ."
We’re blessed with good and bad
We’re blessed with things that make us smile
Some that make us sad
Some blessing are the gifts we have
And talents we possess
Like paintings or a song we sing
Or writings we express
These blessings help us grow inside
While sharing things we do
And often help the other folks
To see the hard times through
Some things are so difficult
The blessings hard to see
They often cloud or grip our lives
In spite of prayerful pleas
If we can learn to see the good
In things that get us down
Then we can see the blessing
In things that make us frown
It must have been so very hard
For Mary on that day
To watch her son be crucified
As she knelt down to pray
He was the perfect Son of God
So young, with much to do
And yet He was called home to God
A tortured death gone through
As we recall our Saviors life
And then our lives compare
It seems a little easier
To see the joy we share
For He has risen home to God
In heaven ‘s home above
And we can each be joining him
Because of the Fathers love
I want to thank you one and all for your comments to the things you are reading on my blog. I sometimes forget that you are there as I sit here in the quite of my room and try to type as fast as mind thinks...that can be tricky..most of you know I talk so imagine how difficult it is to type that fast:) I want you to know from the deepest place in my heart I do not write for your entertainment, I write for my therapy. I needed a place to sort some things out, and I have found an outlet for my sometimes twisted thoughts and emotions that have been bottled up for years. It is difficult to find friends who just want to be there for you. Most feel the need to council, others feel that don't know what to say so they just stay away, and then there are those who just don't really care because it is all about them...you have someone that just popped in your head didn't you:) I feel like I am talking to God not you. I am grateful that you tune in and enjoy my conversation with Him, but I do not blog to offend, to stir up trouble or to single out. I blog because God has given me a gift to express what I feel it is sometimes an eye opener to me by just putting it out there, perhaps you have read something that got you to think about the very thing I myself was wondering, or perhaps you read something that touched you in the same way it touched me when I stopped typing long enough to go back and read what my fingers are saying. If that is the case Praise God for His wonderful insight to you and to me. Please don't take it personal its about me, not you. I love to write poems, I love to express what God is doing in my life and I love that although I may not be able to sit down over a glass of Gary's famous sweet tea, that I can share it with you on my blog. I didn't realize how many people are reading this each day. But I love the comments I am recieving through my email and I love that you are being Blessed.Moral of this blog: "How we praise God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because we belong to Christ."
Friday, June 1, 2007
I’m Not Alone
You Are Not Alone
When people let me down, my smiles are replaced with frowns
I think it is my own fault, and fill my wounds with my own salt
My self-esteem falls through the floor, it hurts me through to my core.
And then I pull down deep inside, and from the world I try to hide.
I can not see the good I've done, nor can I see the morning sun
I shun the ones who say they love, and begin to doubt the Lord above
This dreary sadness fills my soul, my heart fills like an empty bowl
If death would come i would not care, for I have nothing left to give or share
While I sit in my room, dwelling in my selfish gloom
I read a passage in my book that to my very bones I shook
I've read this passage many times, but never did I pay any mind.
I kept this message pushed aside, so I could stay within and hide.
But this time when I read my book, my eyes where opened, I took a look
"I am with you, you are not alone" He said in a soft tone.
A peace came over me as I cried, I no longer wanted to die.
Those words rang out in truth and light, magnified my inner sight
As I looked deep inside of me, I saw the person God saw in me
The word of God was clear that day, I bowed my head and began to pray
In His image I was made, knowing this I'm not afraid
Knowing that I'm not alone cause God is my "cornerstone"
I'm armed against depressions trials, I now live with my Saviors smile.
I have gotten up some days feeling like this. Darkness, like a cloud over my head,
in my soul, and over shadowing the bright morning sun. No interest in the day,
no excitement, or joy. Feeling useless to myself and everyone around me.
Thoughts of all those loved ones who have left me behind, and have gone on to
Glory land.... What a total waste of precious time, gifts, energy, and ministry.
God said in His word, " There is a time for everything and a season for every
activity under the sun..." Ecc. 3:1.
to paraphrase it says a time to be born and die... tear down and rebuild...
weep and laugh...mourn and dance...keep and throw away.... so knowing this,
I share with you, that whatever trial, burden, suffering or trouble you are going through,
This is just a season. When I am in my suffering, depression, etc.. I call that season
Old man Winter, because it is so cold and lonely. When I am rebuilding, throwing away,
etc. I call this Spring because it reminds me of cleaning. When I am dancing, singing,
laughing, this is summer because I am having fun. What ever you are going through
right now just remember this too shall pass for it is a season that God has allowed to
help you grow and learn who He is. It took me a long time to learn this lesson, I
wondered 40 years in the desert on this one Ha! But I didn't go it alone. God sent His
only begotten Son Jesus to walk with on this journey. We matter to God.
"Come to me, all who are weary and I will give you rest." Matt.11:28,
"My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness". 2 Cor. 12:9,
"In this world you will have trouble, but take heart! I have overcome the world".
I could go on and on of His great love for us. "Let us approach the throne of grace
with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us
in our time of need." Hebrews 4:16 I matter to God and you matter to God.
God knows when you are going to have days like this. He also uses people to show
how much He loves you. Ever had a bad day and get a card, or a phone call from
someone you care about and they "just had you on their heart"? Or you have someone
on your heart so strong that you had to send a card or call them? That my friend is God.
And I am not alone because God sent my friend Jesus to be with me always, to the end
of my days. I still have my days, when I do I call on Him and He is near.
Moral of this Blog: " Why are you so downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God."Psalms42:5,6
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Repairing Broken Hearts
Repairing Broken Hearts
My heart goes out to those in need
Sometimes I feel so sad.
And other times my anger flares
Mistreatment makes me mad.
I've seen so many broken hearts
I've seen so many broken hearts
More scarred than battered cheek
Abused with sharp and stabbing words
That make their future bleak.
But then through helpless eyes I see
But then through helpless eyes I see
Someone who lends them aid,
And shelters them from evils touch
And makes them not afraid.
Then thanks I give to God above
Then thanks I give to God above
For those who do their part
Protecting those that stand in need
Repairing Broken Hearts.
I have been feelings down the past several years. I have found an outlet for me to express this anger, confusion and sadness I have felt most of my life. One thing that has saddened me for several years is the homeless that live in our city. They are people whose life has taken a bad turn. They are good people who have had bad luck. The stories they have shared about how they have reach this destination in their lives and the hopelessness they feel, makes my heart hurt. I remember as a child, my grandmother teaching me to always see myself as equal to whom ever I met, no matter their status. Whether they are important business men or homeless, never consider yourself to be more or less, but equal. I found it odd that if I met someone less fortune than me, I was to consider myself to be equal. And when I started to attend school, I was able to fit in with any crowd, the cheerleaders and the drug addicts, the rich and the poor. I was in High School, and there was a family of 9 children who lived on Big Slue Ditch on the east side of town. They all slept in a 2 bedroom house. They had a daughter who attended class with me. Every morning she would come to school smelling of the smoke from the wood that kept her warm the night before, wearing the same clothes she had on the day before and hair that didn't have a silky feel or look about it. Classmates would make fun of her, call her names and laugh at her. I noticed that every day at lunch she sat beside a tree in front of the lunchroom by herself. She never had a packed lunch with her and she never came to eat in the lunch room, she would just sit alone waiting for the bell to ring for her next class. I remember my grandmothers words, "see her as your equal." One day I just decided to be friendly to her, each time I passed her in the hall, saw her in class or anywhere on campus, I would smile and speak. At lunch, I sat down next to her beside her tree, I had packed a lunch that morning to share with her, and began a dialog of conversation. I ask if she would have lunch with me. She seemed rather puzzled, but agreed to eat what I had brought. It was the first time I had seen her smile all year. We enjoyed our sandwich, chips and cupcake, our conversation was brief and we went to class. My friends didn't quit understand why I would hangout with this girl who everyone had condemned to be "trash". I didn't either, I knew my heart hurt for her. When I told my mother about what I had done she said to me, "Vicki, God has given you "compassion"."
Compassion is a virtue that only God can give us. Some are blessed to have it , most are not. Compassion is sometimes a burden that settles heavy on your heart, when you want to help some one and God tells you no, because He wants them right where they are at, to teach them something that only God can. Jesus is a compassionate man, he has a heart for the sick, the lonely, those who are heavy burden and those who are lost. We as believers some how forget about, or loose our compassion for others less fortunate than ourselves. Be become busy, or self absorbed.
I pray I never loose my compassion for other people. That I don't get so busy or self absorbed that I stop caring. That I can always be sensitive to the needs of hurting people that God puts in my path and in my life. I believe it is some of the reasoning behind the losses I have had in my own life. Perhaps it is such a time as this...
Moral of this Blog: " Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility,gentleness, and patience." Colossians 1:23
Well, I don't know where all this came from, I don't even know if it makes any sense but I feel better just getting it out. I think I'm really going to like this blogging stuff.
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